Wanna have a good New Year? Fine.... for those of you who actually take advice from slobs on the internet, here are my rules for the year 2016.
1. Don't do ANYTHING based on what everyone else is doing.
2. Acting mature is for teenagers.
3. Take care of your responsibilities, yet remember the old Polish proverb, "Not my circus, not my monkeys."
4. All things in moderation.
5. Never follow anyone- there are far too many idiots out there with good P.R. staffs.
6. Your New Years resolution... isn't.
7. Everything you see on your TV is FAKE, unless it says "NASA" in the corner.
8. Proper use of the internet is making up 12 sick horoscopes every day and then posting them for people who actually believe that crap.
9. Carry a beat up hockey stick everywhere you go... people will leave you alone.
10. When making a list like this, never stop at ten, because everyone expects you to stop at ten.
11. 2016 is an election year, record 800 hours of music that you like and listen to it until election day- avoid all other media.
12. Every day, take some time to stop and look closely at every single thing around you- in detail.
14. Always skip number 13... trust me on this one.
15. Be glad for your own troubles- everyone else's are worse.
16. Laugh.
17. Always stop at 17... no one expects it.
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